I’m pretty sure you didn’t know this, but Friday was my birthday. And my folks had apparently gotten together with my wife and set up this big party at Dave & Buster’s for me with pool and shuffleboard and the arcade and everything. I woke up that morning a little early, had some time to read the paper, even hit the fast lane on the way into the office and got a primo spot when I parked. It was going to be the best birthday ever.
Then I walked through the front door.
It started with Jan. She had some records she needed me to get from the sub-basement. Yeah, the one that’s being fumigated for mold or rats or maybe moldy rats. And Rachel wanted me to read all these articles on some obscure compliance auditing method and write up a digest of each one — before her 10 o’clock meeting to present them to the Corporate Risk Management Committee. Tom wanted me to put out an ad for actors for some “secret project” he was working on for the end of the month, and Carlotta insisted I fax this giant stack of shipping receipts to her cousin Dino. When I asked why she got all defensive and told me to just do it (sigh).
It was about four as the last page was going through the fax machine when Phil came up to me with a demand that I get moving on collating the Loblaw report before he had to have it in to the courier in order to make the last overnight pickup. So I dug in and started collating the pages, stapling, hole-punching, and (at the same time) calling my folks to let them know that I’d maybe be a little late and to start without me. It was right before five as I was handing Phil the perfectly collated report, he took it from me, and I turned to get my coat and keys that it happened. ”Hey, where are you going?” he called back after me. ”I need the metrics calculated for Monday’s staff meeting!” He held out a folder of papers expectantly.
“But that meeting’s not until 11. I can do it first thing! And I have a thing to get to.”
“Whatever. I don’t want to be worrying about it all weekend. Just bang it out and text me when it’s done. C’mon, I’m gonna be late for happy hour at Schnookers.” He shook the papers in his hand, expecting me to take them.
Unfortunately that’s when I snapped. I snatched them from his hand and started slapping them on the desk as I walked toward him defiantly. ”I (smack) will (smack) do (smack) it (smack) on (smack) Monday (smack) morning (smack)!” And with that, I threw the folder in his face and stomped out.
So of course I got in early this morning and did the metrics and had them ready for Phil on his desk before 8. I’m honestly not quite sure how the rest of the day is going to go for me. But it turned out I was right after all — it was the best birthday ever.
Last 5 posts by Kelvin- Duck and Cover - March 11th, 2010
- Let me give you a hint: it rolls downhill - December 7th, 2009
About Kelvin
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